11. LEFTOVERS

The captain of a massive cruise ship told the roughly 1,900 passengers on board to turn off all lights and music at night, to abstain from deck parties, nighttime movies, and even avoid going on their balconies, for TEN DAYS, in order to avoid pirates. He said the ship “must be prepared for a pirate attack” as it crossed parts of the Indian Ocean. FOX

“But I don’t wanna be a pirate.”

   

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